File this under, “When bad things happen to good vegans.” Or ,“When good vegans make bad choices.”
When I first came across the term “Junk Food Vegan,” I almost laughed out loud. It even sounds like something out of a Jim Gaffigan standup routine. “I think I’m gonna become a junk food vegan. Yeah. I’ll make myself a Hot Pocket and cover it with so much quinoa that no one will know it’s under there. When my friends ask what I’m eating, I’ll say, ‘Just some quinoa.’ And they’ll say, ‘Quin-what? What the hell is that?’” On and on it would go.
I don’t know if dietitian and nutritionist Cynthia Sass coined the term, but in a recent article she said there are such a wide variety of vegan products out there, it is easy to become a “junk food vegan.” No longer do vegans have to limit themselves to nuts, grains, fruits, vegetables, and seeds. Who could live on that?
So where do you find all these so-called vegan junk foods? I found a whole bunch on the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) website. In the same section where you will find the article, “The 5 Best Cruelty-Free Products for Curly Hair”, you will find the Accidentally Vegan Food List.
They draw you in with the following statements: “Many products, including faux franks, veggie burgers, chicken-free chicken patties, flavored soy, almond, and rice milks; nondairy ice creams; and other sensational snacks, are marketed to vegetarians and vegans. However, there’s also an abundance of chips, dips, cookies, candies, frozen pies, soups, and other mouthwatering items produced by some of the most well-known brands that are also vegan.”
When was the last time you saw “mouthwatering”, “sensational”, and “faux franks” in the same paragraph?
If you’re struggling with the vegan diet, consult the list. If your vegan friends are drinking avocado smoothies, you can join them by tossing back a Red Bull Energy Drink or Ghirardelli Hot Chocolate.
Having some friends over after pilates class? Why not treat yourselves to some Entenmann’s Fudge Delight Fudge and Mint Cookies or Doritos Tortilla Chips? If you want to impress the in-laws, why not serve up some Healthy Choice Asian Potstickers and Food Lion Steak Fries. Finish the evening off with a Sara Lee Cherry Pie.
Even vegans have choices to make. No one is going to twist your arm to choose a Pillsbury Turnover instead of kale chip. It’s all up to you.
Now, let’s talk about your curly hair…..
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